Dear dad, it’s Christmas Eve, and it’s our 2nd one without you. I hate saying it. I miss you so much and I’m feeling like a bah humbug right now. I just can’t get into the Xmas spirit. I’m just not happy about Christmas any more. It will never ever be the same without you. I can’t get into it at all. Tomorrow just won’t be the same. You really will be missed. I’ve been feeling very emotional this month. The dread of Xmas. Missing you so much. I feel like someone is digging and twisting my stomach. There’s so much heartache. I know you wouldn’t want anyone feeling this way but it’s the way we feel. Im going to get up early tomorrow. Collect Rocky and take him for a long walk and run with him before giving mum her presents. Hopefully Rocky will settle so mum can open her presents in peace. Lol. Then it’s dinner here. That’s when my heartache will get even worse. Not having you here with your hat on. Singing to the words. That’s really hard to deal with. I have your place at our table. You will always have a place here. Always. I will make mum happy tomorrow. As I know she will find tomorrow very hard. I will always look after mum. And I know you know that dad. Maybe you can give us a sign that you are near tomorrow. Even if it’s a joke, or something that you would find funny. Just to let us know you are with us in our hearts. But dad… no funny business where you make me jump! I know that would make you laugh but I don’t think I could take that right now 🤣 Dad Merry heavenly Christmas to you. I hope where ever heaven is you all have a merry time. We miss you so much. I love you to the moon and back. Love from Lesley 💙💔💙💔💙💔💙💔💙💔💙💔💙💔💙💔xxxxx